序章 5 - 無力的堅持 與 無情的言語
「月光通道？怎可能有那種東西？」
「狐狸在哪裡？少騙人！」
「該長大了，Mei。」
如此這般的說話，我已經數不清聽過多少遍了。雖然我很想
我總算明白 JOBI 國王的苦況。當堅持已久的事情得不到別人認同，那種無力
甚至令我對自己產生懷疑......
「Mei，你不需要勉強去實現 JOBI 國王的理想啊。反正我們現在生活得很好不是嗎？」
新生 JOBI 悠閒地躺在我的房間邊吃糖果邊看書。一向悠然自得的牠倒
不經不覺來到我家快三年的 JOBI，成長速度跟學習能力都非常高。牠已經長得跟 JOBI 國王差不多高了，而且很懂得照顧自己。唯一不變的，就是
所以，為了讓牠跟我一起努力。我決定用糖果引誘牠。
「JOBI，我想請你幫我做一件事情。如果你答應的話，
「噢噢噢當然好！你想我幫忙做什麼？」JOBI 興奮得雙眼發光。
「我想你在大家面前開啟月光通道。這樣的話即使他們看不
誰知道 JOBI 聽到我的計劃之後，興奮的情緒一下子就冷靜下來。
「可是我不懂得打開通道的方法耶！我又不是國王....
「既然你跟 JOBI 國王一樣擁有月光狐血統的話，我相信你一定會找到方法的
而 JOBI 好像也能夠看得出來。
「......Mei，你要我這樣做，真的是為了 JOBI 國王的理想嗎？還是其實只為了滿足你自己啊？」
牠的質問深深刺中了我的痛處。
雖然我不想承認，可是當我鍥而不捨地努力想讓大家相信狐
「算了！既然你不肯幫我，那就當我沒說過吧！反正我早就
「Mei......? 」JOBI 望著激動起來的我，眼神變得十分陌生。
「或許......或許所謂的『狐狸』，其實只是小時候
「Mei！我......」JOBI 試圖握住我的手，卻被我大力甩開。
「根．本．從．來．都．不．存．在！」
那個時候，自私而軟弱的我完全沒有顧及 JOBI 的感受。心中埋藏已久的不快讓無情的說話像缺堤般衝口而
我頭也不回衝出家門。
然後，我的世界也同時「恢復正常」。
-Ms.Traveller
JOBI the Moon Fox
Prologue 5 - Powerless Persistence and Ruthless Words
'Moonlight tunnel? How does that exist?'
'Where is the fox? Stop lying!'
'Grow up, Mei!'
All theses years, I had heard uncountable words like these. I wanted to let more people know the existence of the foxes, yet no one was able to see them, thus no one believed me.
I finally came to understand the helplessness JOBI the King once felt － I couldn't earned any recognition for what I had been believing for years.
I was so discouraged, even started doubting...
'Mei, Why do you persist to achieve the will of JOBI the King so reluctantly? We are having a good life, aren't we?'
Newborn JOBI was laying on the floor in my room carelessly, eating candies while reading. This unrestrained fox didn't have the tendency to inherit the belief of its past generation.
Three years had passed since JOBI came to my home. It had grown a lot, with the height almost as same as JOBI the King. It was a fast-learner, it knew how to take care of itself well.
The only thing that didn't change, was that it still craved for the candies I gave it when we first met.
Thence, in order to motivate it to work with me, I decided to use candies as a bite.
'JOBI, I would like you to do something for me. If you promise me, you will be given candies with the amount of a whole month, how about that?' I put a big can of candies equaled half of my spending money for a month in front of JOBI.
'OHHHHH SURE! What do you want me to do?' JOBI's eyes were brightened with excitement.
'I want you to open the moonlight tunnel and let everyone sees it. Even they can't see you, they will trust me as the moon will become fuller and brighter oddly!' This had to work.
However JOBI was cooled off after hearing my plan.
'But I don't know how to open it...I'm not the king.' JOBI seemed troubled.
'You have the blood of Moon Fox like JOBI the King, there must be a way you can do that. Please try. I can't think of other ways to let them believe me... You have to help me!' I did realised I was being unreasonable, yet I was exhausted by the failures I had faced these three years.
JOBI seemed to know.
'Mei, what you wanted me to do, is to fulfil the wish of JOBI the King? Or just for yourself?' Its questioning touched my raw nerve.
I hated to admit it. I was so persistent and had put much effort in making others to believe the existence of the foxes, still I got no retribution at all, the doubts inside my heart started to spread.
'Fine! Forget it if you are not helping me! I had a feeling about it anyway, the reason I can see foxes others cannot see...is not because I'm unique...'
'Mei...?' JOBI stared at me like looking at a stranger.
'Maybe...maybe the 'foxes' were merely my imaginary friends to comfort myself as I wasn't able to make friends in my childhood!! Moonlight tunnel, JOBI the King, and you...'
'Mei! I...' JOBI attempted to grab my hand, but I flung its paw away.
'DO NOT EXIST!'
At that moment, I was too wrapped up in myself to consider the feeling of JOBI. The unsatisfactory piled up in my heart pushed the ruthless words out of my lips.
I ran away from home.
Then my life went back to 'normal'.
-Ms.Traveller
沒有留言:
張貼留言